It's been a long year. And I've definitely been lazy and missed 99.99% of the great quotes here. Ah well. Here goes... DevQuotes 2008.
To make it more clear, every other quote will be bolded.
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"It's a condom! It's a mint!


It's a condiment!" - `VernonX9000 in response to 'Flavoured condoms confuse me.' in the Do you consider yourself good-looking?' thread. - Feb.22/08


"If you are board, go hook up with a plank and make sweet love behind the sawmill..." - ~Epifols in the 'I am board' thread – Feb.25/08


"I must say though a woman's neck can make or break her.

Especially if she falls off a horse." - =PyroSikTh in the 'Why do us guys do this?' thread - March.15/08


"Fuck you muffin man." - `votemark in the 'Do you know the muffin man?' thread – March.29/08


"Turned on every light in the house, let my car warm up for 3 hours, used up 17 aerosol cans, and ate a bald eagle." - ~Chaser9900 in the 'Earth Hour - What did you do?' thread – April.10/08


"Now, this is a story all about how
My life got flipped-turned upside down
And I like to take a minute
Just sit right 'round
I'll tell you how I became the Murk of a town Wellington

In east Hamilton bored and strange
On the computer was where I spent most of my days
Chillin' out clickin' relaxin' all cool
And l33tin sum n00bs when they got out of the school
When a couple of laywers
Who were up to no good
Startin making trouble with my game making mood
They got in one little fight and Martin got bummed
He said 'Fine you can borrow my credit card to get to Wellington'

I whistled for a bus and when it came near
The license plate said naked and it had an irish for a driver
If anything I can say this bus isn't fun
But I thought 'No, forget it' - 'Yo Red, to Wellington!'

I pulled up to the city about 7 or 8
And I yelled to the driver 'Where the hells Courtnay Place'?
I looked at my kingdom
The trip was finally done
To sit on my throne as the Murk of Wellington" - `MurkHellsing's journal – April.17/08


"I just hope Jacob kills Bella in the fourth before the wedding. And then he kills himself. And then at seeing Bella dead, Edward goes back to the Volturi and gets himself killed too. It'd be like Hamlet... only, not as good. " - ~blindflyleaf - in the ' The Twilight/Stephanie Meyer sticky thread - Please post here!' - June.8/08


" " I do." Feel free to quote me on that " - `VernonX9000 , reply in his 'Just Married' journal – June.19/08


"Aww. How sweet. You both wouldn't have much pubic hair, so you'll make squeaky noises during sex." - `Prince-des-Sots in response to 'is it normal now to start dating at 9?' in the
'normal age for dating?' thread – June.24/08


"Doesn't really matter, everyone knows she's going to choose Edward. But honestly, I cannot stand the Edward/Bella relationship. Especially on Bella's end of the stick.
"I don't want to be like some hick that gets married right after high school. BUT IF YOU FUCK ME I WILL! AASDGOJDFOHDD " "- ~Dani-Marie in the 'Edward vs. Jacob' thread – July.2/08


"No offense but if you're going to take a potato peeler to your grocery sack, you need help at the checkout." - =WarthogDemon in the 'Cutting pubic hair.' thread –July.3/08


"My brother texts people on his phone D: I can hear the fast-paced pressing of buttons, then a pause, then PLOP! Then it starts again." - =Jequila in the 'Reading on a toilet?' thread - July.8/08


"I actually thought you were staring a phrase.

Like, "it is said whenever a penis is floppy, an angel cries" or something " - =WarthogDemon in the 'um im sad ;(' thread – July.13/08


"But bear in mind, my lifetime goal is to become that cranky old bastard who wears a robe to Walmart and yells at impertinent teenagers." - *wazzdakka - in the 'Know what's yummylicious?' thread – July.21/08


"She can lay in the street in hell and we'll paint those cone tits orange and she can be traffic cone tits Madonna " - *mynameiskeke - in the 'I hate disabled people, am I going to hell?' thread – July.28/08


"wait a sec -- you're in Ireland. i don't believe for a hot minute that Ireland has a frickin drinking age." - *raspil - in the 'Americans!!!' thread – Aug.6/08


"Jam, to me, is the congealing cum of dreams." - `Prince-des-Sots - in the 'Do joo like jam?' thread – Aug.13/08


"YOU WERE ALL OVER THAT BITCH.

You were all, "Damn, if that's how it's goin' down! Shiiiiit."






" - @martypunker in response to @Rendarin saying he was ready to lock the 'Show me the contents in your bra.' thread - Aug.23/08


“@martypunker: It'll become a fad to have, "I knew martypunker," carved on tombstones. Tombstones manufacturers will have trouble meeting the demand of martypunker tombstones and will soon shut down, being replaced by revolutionary flying orbs that pulsate, sending submental messages of, "martypunker was a good man, even though I never knew him, I knew him well." The President of the Global United Nation-States of Americastraland will announce a global holiday, recognising my glory. It will be celebrated by fire raining from the sky into pools of molten magma. By this time, humans will have the capability to communicate with the sharks who will also share in this joy by performing backflips over seals which they will then eat. This is a good thing, however, because it turns out that seals are the real cause of global warming, as Al Gore
III will find out in the future.

`laurart:Will watching the movie Jaws and enjoying the killing of the shark be considered a bad thing once our relation with those animals is established as "friendly" ?

@martypunker:It's actually in legislation as we speak. Most people are skeptical because they're not sure if an Al Gore III will ever exist or if they'd be able to tolerate him for long
enough not to kill him. They fear that communication with sharks is a silly idea that some third grader made up while bored in class. This may seem like a logical approach, but only because it is. Al Gore III will be in the third grade when he doodles the first basic design the machine that will help humans communicate with sharks. In fourth grade, he'll discover seals as the main cause of global warming while pretending to experiment on his sister's Super Awesome Barbie.

I digress. To answer your question in a more straightforward fashion, Jaws and all other movies depicting sharks, especially Great White sharks as evil, vicious, or otherwise harmful to humans will be completely banned in all three United Nation-States (Austachipan, Englatalyanceissa, and the Americas). At first, people will rebel against the prohibition, but unlike in America's 1920s, this will not relent into the government lifting the prohibition. The rebels will be small and highly outnumbered, mostly because it will be understood why sharks are so revered. After fixing global warming, Al Gore III will become the Prime Minister of Lugoshavia, marry Hilary
Clinton IV, and have five children, Bill, Barak, John, John, and John. In the confusion over which John was being spoken to, a global war will break out in which hordes of sharks will rescue us again.

It's a glorious future, I promise." - Aug.25/08


"It's about vampires made of lensflare and Mary-Sues.

I'm serious." - ~CrossMirage on what Twilight is about. - in the 'Twilighters giving blood?' thread - Sept.2/08


"Yeah, you're a cabana boy away from a sausage party." - @summaro - in the 'is this gay or not?' thread - Sept.2/08


"I would call you a cunt, but you lack both the depth and the warmth" - =Vynnx in the 'Bitchiest lines you can use on an ex!!' thread - Sept.7/08


"If I had a penis, I'd name it The Love Sausage, and I'd be gettin' boners like it's nobody's business." - ~powrpop in the 'Give your weiner a name XD' thread – Sept.14/08


"Beauty is a lie. A big fat make up covered 45 year old bleach blonde botoxed liposuctioned lie.

It is something we should all aspire to." -~gooseberryspeak in the 'STRETCH MARKS & Other Perceived Imperfections' thread - Sept.15/08


"Unless I'm in the middle of a long fart my expression is pretty stoic." - =dVusMind in the 'Do you make...[a corresponding face when you post emotes?]' thread – Sept.16/08


"Lack of internet is really meaning I have a life these days. I have to DO things to keep me amused... its like the early 90's all over again and that's feeling nice." ~GeeWiz journal entry – Sept.28/08


"lets just put it this way: If I tried to wear white to my wedding (and there actually was a God) I'd be struck down by lightening.

I honestly can't imagine not having sex before marriage: what if the guy you end up marrying is hung like a tic-tac and a ten-second wonder?" - =AkimaDoll in the 'Virgin' thread - Oct.7/08

"MY PUBES ARE SO NICE I SHOULD LET THEM TURN INTO A JUNGLE " - ~eyeroll - in the 'The most f*cked up thing a doctor ever said to you' thread. - Oct.25/08


" Its easy, all you gotta do is slide this hand up here...And this hand around here...And then lean in like this...And then move that hand down a little...But not too far or you're just groping them...And...Viola! Hawtness!" - `MurkHellsing on how to flirt. - Oct.30/08


"Well, it's still supposedly the case (since there are, y'know, 13 year olds as members here) but it seems to be more "No GRAPHIC sexual discussions in the Forums" and is applied mainly to the thread starter and subject.

So while I couldn't start a thread called "Let's discuss `votemark choking on my massive man-meat and gagging on the river of babies I sent gushing down his throat!" I can still have a conversation in someone else's thread about `laurart touching herself in the shower while thinking about !wigglepuppy's puppy wiggling around inside of her. " - `VernonX9000 - in the 'FixMeKnow is around!' thread - Nov.5/08


"Every time you kill a kitten, God puts a fizz bubble in a can of pop... " - *TheHollister - in the 'Fizz and Soda' thread - Nov.6/08


"Thank god I've never touched my mom's vagina " - =Evanescenceheart - on being born via C-Section - in the 'Did your parents have children?' thread - Nov.12/08


"`Vlei is Canadian for "typo"

You'll get used to it " - `VernonX9000 in the 'Stupid New @dmins' thread - Nov.17/08


"Oh god, I couldn't imagine myself as a parent either.For the longest time I would clap and whistle and say "C'mere boy!" to get my little brother's attention." - ~captain-vodka - in the 'Let's make a baby.' thread – Nov.20/08


"The morning of my ACTs, I woe up with horrible pains and nausea. (I have a medical problem, and I often need pain medication) So I toke a bunch of my pain medication, afraid that I would be in too severe of pain to take the ACT. However, I get really loopy and nutty when I'm on it. Fast forward to when I'm taking the actual exam, and during the science portion I start getting giggly. So for some reason I still can't figure out, I started singing the song from Charlie and the Chocolate Factory and started doodling dancing rabbits on the test instead of the answers. " - ~rabbitears in the 'Your worst Exam moments!' thread – Nov.30/08


"He'd be good in complaints, turning everything into whine, and all." - `Vlei in the 'Why Jesus would be a bad forumer... ' thread – Dec.2/08


"Like peeing on yourself, everyone can see it but only you get that warm feeling. " - ^Thebuild in the 'Love is _____' thread - Dec.5/08


"Dude, your boobs look like elbows! "-`VernonX9000 on my DorkID - Dec.13/08


"My dad added to the Fairy Tales.

"What big ears you have!"
"Oh yeah, well that's just your opinion, you little shit.

He was a fun man." - ~EpicNguyen in the 'Favorite Fairy Tale?' thread - Dec.13/08


" "I love you" good
"I want to fiddle your pixie stick" bad

"I really want to spend more time with you" good
"Want to see my interspecies erotica collection?" bad

"I have to confess, i have a crush on you" good
"I have to confess, i watch you from the bushes" bad

"You are the ray sunshine that keeps me going on a rainy day" good
"You are the STD that keeps me scratching myself" bad" -~Off111 in the 'Ways to confess your love??' thread - Dec.31/08


Over 'n' Out! Happy New Year, everyone!
DevQuotes 2007
DevQuotes2006